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[Has it already been five weeks of CotW? I’m sure thankful that Dreamweaver is doing the lord’s work with a weekly round up of Destructoid’s weirdest and most insightful comments! Want to see your own comment featured? Join the community participate in the discussion today! -Striderhoang]
Welcome back to Comments of the Week, and I’m your host, Dreamweaver! Comments of the Week is a series where I showcase a bunch of comments I enjoyed reading throughout the week to share with the community who might’ve missed them with the other personal matters in their lives!
Being up for display is a great honor, as not only are you singled out, but you also get a second chance to shine to the people who might’ve missed your comments the first time around!
TRUTH: because the truth hurts.
LOL: because rolling on the floor is painful.
WUT?: because you’ll never find out which is worse: getting kicked in the nuts or childbirth.
Huh, now I’m curious: whichisworse? Because I know you got an entire body coming out of your vagina. But come on, being kicked in the nuts is like me squeezing your uterus like a dog’s chew toy; it hurts! Once, I got kicked down there so hard that I literally dropped to the floor and I felt like I was going to throw up.
Out of my mouth. Not my penis.
Where was I? Oh, right, Comments of the Week. Let’s get started!
FromThe originalDoomgets a ‘selfie support’ fan mod
Dreamweaver:I always knew those pickled gherkins taste of pure evil…
FromHow short is too short? Controversy overThe Order: 1886‘s length
Dreamweaver:It’s not the length that matters, it’s whether or not you enjoy it. Oh, that also applies to games.
FromDetails revealed for microtransaction-ladenPokémon Shuffleand they’re pretty disgusting
Dreamweaver:Just because it’s free doesn’t excuse it. Garbage is free and back then you could even get cash for recycling.
FromSony appears to have ‘abandoned’ its trademark forThe Last Guardian
Dreamweaver:That’s cold… William.
Dreamweaver:It has to be made first before it can be lost.
FromLink is the most popular amiibo in the world, US and Canada account for 63% of all amiibo shipments
Dreamweaver:Guess he’s not the “weakest” Link after all…
FromLast Guardian‘still in development’ despite trademark abandonment
Dreamweaver:Plot twist:The Last Guardianis the little boy and the the last human on Earth.
FromLetters to the editor: Why should I keep reading Destructoid?
FromSquare Enix is taking pitches for a newGex
FromI bet you’d like some Predator in yourMortal Kombat X
FromVery Quick Tips:Pokémon Shuffle
Dreamweaver:If you need tips on hownotto get screwed over by microtransactions, then the game probably isn’t worth playing.
From33% offInquisition, 10% off Xbox One & PS4 bundle deals for the holiday weekend
Dreamweaver:Ouya? Ooh rah!
FromHere’s the rub on the Best Buy Meta Knight amiibo in-store situation
Dreamweaver:I’ve heard that joke before but I really got a kick out of the execution!
Dreamweaver:But still arousing.
Dreamweaver:He’s got 99 things in that bag but a gun ain’t one.
FromWhat would it be like if Nintendo ran a theme park?
Dreamweaver:I would love to come on that ride.
Dreamweaver:I love that his avatar is still giving a thumbs up.
FromInternal Gamestop memo notes massive delay for pre-ordered amiibo, no duplicates even with reserves
Dreamweaver:By feeding them Mike and Ikes?
Dreamweaver:Them wordplays!
FromThe hunt is on for the Metal Knight amiibo, here is what I found
FromTrue Life: One man’s descent into deliriumiibo
Dreamweaver:And still come up short, judging by how much amiibo go for.
FromSurprise! Kids are annoying and god awful atSuper Meat Boy
FromNintendo predicted the amiibo shortage 11 years ago
Dreamweaver:Gajknight has to answer to life.
FromWatch Villager pocket all of the moves inSuper Smash Bros. Wii U
Dreamweaver:Yeah, the art of ass kicking!
FromThere’s no regular-size New 3DS in North America because it’d be too confusing
Dreamweaver:Show of hands, who did?
FromFinal Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn‘s Gold Saucer looks amazing
Dreamweaver:We have our own smut peddler who draws his own Rule 34.
FromTingle is the heterosexual hero that gaming deserves
Dreamweaver:What about the actual questions that matter, like how big his cock is?
FromNazi zombies inTrials Fusion, yes,Trials Fusion
FromYear of the Goat: goats/sheep/rams in videogames
Dreamweaver:What a surprise. We’re all so very shocked.
Alright, then, that’s it for this edition! I hope you guys enjoyed yourselves! As always, suggestions will be read and appreciated, and we’ll shoot for another episode next week! Remember, I can’t do this without YOU!
No, seriously, I can’t: it’s YOUR comments (and occasionally mine, because I’m conceited like that) that makes up this feature, so don’t be shy!
